Post by Mr. Katz on Dec 12, 2018 0:32:50 GMT
A camera with 6% battery broadcasts a brown door to the Michigan Stadium’s titantron. The PA system turns on as some chords on a guitar are played. A voice with a strong English accent and a voice with a strong Hispanic accent sing in alternating intervals.
🎵I’m terrified
Gonna run for your life
I’m terrified
El gigante te matara🎵
The brown door is opened before the camera displays Mr Katz, curled up next to his Hardcore championship, on a white table in a dark room strumming a green guitar. Once the camera crew is noticed the white painted face starts smiling as the camera crew approaches slowly and the door is heard closing. Mr Katz raises his index finger to his lips to hush the camera crew.
Mr Katz: Shh. Hello there, I’m um...currently hiding from my tag team pawtner Clawde because I heard he wanted to kick my ass.
Mr Katz chuckles nervously as he looks genuinely scared, scratching the back out of his black hair in nerves. Sighing defeated, Mr Katz addresses the camera.
Mr Katz: While I’m hiding it feels like I have some time to talk about my match tonight, Clawde Vigor and I take on the married couple of The Reeses. Clawde apparently has a pawblem with The Reeses, I’m more of a KitKat gentlemen myself but that matters not. I’m going to let Clawde take out The Reeses and just stay out of the way...
After exhaling very quietly Mr Katz pats the gold plate of the Hardcore championship on the table with a smile on his white painted face, using his other hand to hold up his head.
Mr Katz: The Reeses and KitKats are chocolate but this isn’t chocolate, it’s real gold. It’s the Hardcore championship! This is all that matters and there is no point getting in Clawde’s way, we know he doesn’t need more of a reason to kick my ass. I’m just trying to survive and get through this match without Clawde getting his hands on me. If somehow Clawde gets his hands on me, my insides are going to be my outsides. However I don’t need to get my ass kicked this week, as long as I’m not stupid my ass is saved for another week.
Katz has a smug grin and shakes his head side to side as he says “I don’t need to get my ass kicked this week” before the grin disappears. The Hardcore champion lays flat on the white table, some tears well up in his bright green eyes as he contemplates his fairly miserable existences.
Mr Katz: I wish I COULD help out against The Reeses, but I’m too scared of Clawde. I’m too afraid to live my life around Clawde but for some reason we are teamed up. Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get. One day you become Hardcore champion and the next day your tag team partner wants to put you in the ground. It’s crazy that I’m afraid of my own tag team pawtner more than my opponents, I know Clawde can lay waste to The Reeses because I’ve seen his destruction. I-I just...I find it pointless to pretend Clawde and I are “homies” or “amigos” because we aren’t, once he’s done with The Reeses everyone knows I’m going to be experiencing a hellish asskicking. Even being Clawde’s tag team partner isn't going to protect me, simply nothing will. I might as well be on the other team for all it matters to Clawde. A part of me wants to believe Clawde won’t kick my ass if I tried to help out but I’m not going to take the risk of getting hurt and losing my Hardcore title. I didn’t win the Hardcore championship by taking risks, I won it by being smart and just….staying out of people’s way. If I get in the way and somehow The Reeses defeat us…
Mr Katz shudders and bites his lip hard.
Mr Katz: No, we need to win or I’m dead. I’m going to lose my nine lives if we lose so I’m going to do my best to win. The best I can do is to stay out of people’s way whether the fans and I like it or not.
The camera’s battery dies, ending the broadcast abruptly.
🎵I’m terrified
Gonna run for your life
I’m terrified
El gigante te matara🎵
The brown door is opened before the camera displays Mr Katz, curled up next to his Hardcore championship, on a white table in a dark room strumming a green guitar. Once the camera crew is noticed the white painted face starts smiling as the camera crew approaches slowly and the door is heard closing. Mr Katz raises his index finger to his lips to hush the camera crew.
Mr Katz: Shh. Hello there, I’m um...currently hiding from my tag team pawtner Clawde because I heard he wanted to kick my ass.
Mr Katz chuckles nervously as he looks genuinely scared, scratching the back out of his black hair in nerves. Sighing defeated, Mr Katz addresses the camera.
Mr Katz: While I’m hiding it feels like I have some time to talk about my match tonight, Clawde Vigor and I take on the married couple of The Reeses. Clawde apparently has a pawblem with The Reeses, I’m more of a KitKat gentlemen myself but that matters not. I’m going to let Clawde take out The Reeses and just stay out of the way...
After exhaling very quietly Mr Katz pats the gold plate of the Hardcore championship on the table with a smile on his white painted face, using his other hand to hold up his head.
Mr Katz: The Reeses and KitKats are chocolate but this isn’t chocolate, it’s real gold. It’s the Hardcore championship! This is all that matters and there is no point getting in Clawde’s way, we know he doesn’t need more of a reason to kick my ass. I’m just trying to survive and get through this match without Clawde getting his hands on me. If somehow Clawde gets his hands on me, my insides are going to be my outsides. However I don’t need to get my ass kicked this week, as long as I’m not stupid my ass is saved for another week.
Katz has a smug grin and shakes his head side to side as he says “I don’t need to get my ass kicked this week” before the grin disappears. The Hardcore champion lays flat on the white table, some tears well up in his bright green eyes as he contemplates his fairly miserable existences.
Mr Katz: I wish I COULD help out against The Reeses, but I’m too scared of Clawde. I’m too afraid to live my life around Clawde but for some reason we are teamed up. Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get. One day you become Hardcore champion and the next day your tag team partner wants to put you in the ground. It’s crazy that I’m afraid of my own tag team pawtner more than my opponents, I know Clawde can lay waste to The Reeses because I’ve seen his destruction. I-I just...I find it pointless to pretend Clawde and I are “homies” or “amigos” because we aren’t, once he’s done with The Reeses everyone knows I’m going to be experiencing a hellish asskicking. Even being Clawde’s tag team partner isn't going to protect me, simply nothing will. I might as well be on the other team for all it matters to Clawde. A part of me wants to believe Clawde won’t kick my ass if I tried to help out but I’m not going to take the risk of getting hurt and losing my Hardcore title. I didn’t win the Hardcore championship by taking risks, I won it by being smart and just….staying out of people’s way. If I get in the way and somehow The Reeses defeat us…
Mr Katz shudders and bites his lip hard.
Mr Katz: No, we need to win or I’m dead. I’m going to lose my nine lives if we lose so I’m going to do my best to win. The best I can do is to stay out of people’s way whether the fans and I like it or not.
The camera’s battery dies, ending the broadcast abruptly.
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