I Came Here To Drink Tea And Kick Ass, I'm All Out Of Tea

Mr Katz, wearing his black outfit with a black, leather jacket and gold cross, appears in catering of The Royal Farms Arena sipping on hot tea at a table as the camera crew records him. The bright, yellowish lights and huge size of the catering room contrasts the dark, tiny rooms Katz has been hiding in since joining the roster. It seems he is more confident but the worried painted face of Katz displays his thoughts better than his words ever could. The Hardcore Champion chuckles nervously before speaking at a normal volume.


Mr Katz: I hope SAGA has the best security because Clawde Vigor wants to kick my ass. I suppose I deserve this, unfortunately I only seem to be making things worse for myself. I’m in big trouble for real. It’s so bizarre, the more I stand up for myself, the more I mess up.


Mr Katz looks to the side, possibly on the look out for Vigor or Kai Stevens. Standing up for himself included smashing a guitar through Claude Vigor’s head from the apron. Colin Windsor thinks Mr Katz did the right thing but the Hardcore champion clearly regrets his decision now and is worried. Shaking his head in and taking a deep breath, Mr Katz continues.


Mr Katz: It seems nothing can stop Clawde’s fury with me and my ass is going to be inevitably kicked by him. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid of Clawde but I’m taking everything head on. I’m even taking on Kai Stevens head on, I’m going to build on the mistakes I made, educating myself from them. A mistake only stays a mistake if you don't learn from it. I can’t be afraid or Kai is going to pummel me. Fighting starts in your head and ends in a ring. I hope things get better since I’m standing up for myself.


Stealing the Hardcore title was one thing but ever since he smashed Vigor with the guitar, Katz knows he’s going to be wrecked in a hurry. Every inciting action only speeds up the ticking time bomb that is Claude Vigor. Claude has no reason to be nice to Katz now, as if he was being nice in the first place, their tag team match at Seasons Bleedings is over. Lonely, that’s what The Hardcore Champion is going to be for a while. Katz is now by himself with two dangerous, bloodthirsty monsters trying to kill him. Katz takes a few minutes to take deep, calming breaths. The Rockstar looks worried and tired, he probably hasn’t slept in days, but a smile on his face reassures the crowd that he is fine.


Mr Katz: Don’t worry about me though, I’m going to bring the same great guitar action. Everyone knows that SAGA stands for Super Awesome Guitar Action! I’ll survive Kai and Vigor. No, actually I’m not just going to survive but I’m going to BEAT KAI STEVENS! I hope that’s okay with you Kai, we all lose in this business eventually. Losing is part of the business you and I chose to be a part of. Michael Reese told me to make sure I win my match, I’ll do all I can. I’m putting in all my effort to defeat Kai Stevens, The Pure Champion isn’t just a practice opponent after all but just because Kai Stevens isn’t a practice match doesn’t mean he isn’t great practice for Clawde Vigor. I’m going forward, training and improving my craft every match. I haven’t stayed up all night because of fear, it’s because I’m studying tape and hitting the gym. I’m going to keep going until I’m strong enough to defeat Clawde, that starts with Kai Stevens.


Chuckling nervously again Mr Katz continues, shifting the topic from his Vigor to his new opponent Kai Stevens. Mr Katz sighs, clearly looking unimpressed before continuing to speak.


Mr Katz: From what I heard The Pure Champion is a sadistic fucker. Can’t you see I don’t give a shit, I don’t give a shit and I’m going to throw that out there!


Mr Katz smugly smiles while taking another sip of his tea. The champion’s green eyes stare through the camera’s lens with some newfound sass as if laughing at Kai despite their tired look. Putting down his drink, Katz folds his hands together and continues on about his opponent.


Mr Katz: Kai Stevens is a shitty guy, and what he does is shitty, but there's logic to his thinking. Kai thinks if he can bleed people to death, he will be respected as Pure Champion. Since dying in a match against Kai Stevens is a solid alternative to dying to the Plague and not much else, I will try not to bleed to death although I’m sure Kai isn't trying to make my job easier. I've already bleed before but I have all 9 lives, I'm still pretty.


Mr Katz waves off his opponent after referencing what Rock N Roll God did to him, an event that scarred the Hardcore champion. The green eyes blankly stare at the camera but his eyes aren’t reading “sassy” anymore. Mr Katz shuts his eye before reopening them with a serious look on his face.


Mr Katz: Kai is admittedly "addicted to brutality" well when I send you off to the medical facility, they'll send you to rehab. You are out of place in a wrestling ring or even for a civilized society, you belong in rehab. No, wait scratch that, Kai, you don't belong in rehab because you belong in a psych ward in a straightjacket. Maybe a therapist can help work through your anger issues.
I want to rationalize your behavior, what caused you to be this violent monster? Did your family beat you with a belt every morning for nine years? Did your mother wish you were never born? Did your family get murdered in front of your very eyes?


Katz takes deep breaths, the serious look never disappearing from his painted face.


Mr Katz: Maybe you weren’t like me, maybe you chose to be this monster. Maybe you think you are better as a monster. Kai is desperate to be seen as a scary monster, I’m not trying to be a monster. I already got the fans to love and respect me without trying to make myself seem bigger than I am. I already got the championship without having to bleed people. If you ever running out of ideas on how to get respect just hit the big red button that reads “BIG SCARY MONSTER”, that’s how you get respect right? No. Being a scary monster doesn’t make people respect you, it makes you a bully and it only pushes people away. Keep trying to be a monster though, I’m trying to be a winner and a champion. I am trying to be loved. I will be the unexpected BEST champion in SAGA, with so much hype and momentum from my fans behind me I’m going to add more wins to my name. There is a lot of glory to be had by defeating you Kai, beating you will be huge. I might take your title and become a double champion because I’m just that good. I will flush your reputation down the toilet.


Mr Katz chuckles some more, looking down before licking his lips. Looking up, Mr Katz wraps up his message.


Mr Katz: By watching recordings of your match with Maddox, I know the basics of your behavior but nothing beats getting in the ring with an opponent. You will be helping me improve every minute I am in the ring with you. While you are out here trying to cripple me, I’m learning more about how your brain works. Let’s go open up your brain and look inside it. I’m calculating how violent and bloodthirsty you truly are, seeing what makes you tick. I want to know what risks you are willing to take to make me bleed, then I will apply that information to Vigor. Opponents come and go but the lessons you learn from them stay with you forever. I may be delicate and sensitive but I’m a bright man. Watching tapes, training my body, studying from ringside, and getting in the ring to test my knowledge. As a result of my systematic efforts, I win before your violent, ape brain even hears the bell ring.


Katz sighs, getting up and picking up his Hardcore title. Mr Katz goes around the table and throws the Hardcore title over his shoulder, exiting catering as the scene fades.